Dating site failure
In 2016, dating apps are old news, just an increasingly normal way to look for love and sex. Of course, results can vary depending on what it is people want—to hook up or have casual sex, to date casually, or to date as a way of actively looking for a relationship.“I have had lots of luck hooking up, so if that’s the criteria I would say it’s certainly served its purpose,” says Brian, a 44-year-old gay man who works in fashion retail in New York City.
The question is not if they work, because they obviously can, but how well do they work? “I have not had luck with dating or finding relationships.”“I think the way I’ve used it has made it a pretty good experience for the most part,” says Will Owen, a 24-year-old gay man who works at a marketing agency in New York City.
So, in a sense, Greenspun is intuitively right that internet dating isn’t there yet. Chemistry—the recognition that occurs between two people that they could each imagine a wonderful life in the other’s arms—this kind of chemistry happens offline.
My hope is that as more and more people embrace the internet’s power to create magic in the real world, the curve that maps the ease of finding and sustaining true love will lift upwards.
“I haven’t been looking for a serious relationship in my early 20s.
It’s great to just talk to people and meet up with people.”“I have a boyfriend right now whom I met on Tinder,” says Frannie Steinlage, a 34-year-old straight woman who is a health-care consultant in Denver.
Adrianne Jeffries of Betabeat pinged me yesterday with a link to a post from Philip Greenspun titled, “Is this continued existence of involuntarily single people proof that online dating is a failure?
Accordingly, the best sites are fairly effective at helping the most highly motivated ring-seekers find a match—and therefore account for some of the differential between the two curves we drew a minute ago.Check out the ecstatic German poet Rilke on the topic: And I believe this is becoming increasingly difficult. The second: Time versus the Ease of Finding and Sustaining True Love (or even good-enough-love).This curve, I think, would be curving downward even more steeply than the marriage rate.Some say that’s a billion dollar “recession proof” opportunity.But make no mistake about it, this is a tough and oversaturated market to enter at this stage.